that’s what SHE said: good enough mothering, letting go of guilt, Michelle Obama, a father’s deployment, and more . . .
{click on the title to read the whole post} The Good Enough Mother | Flux Capacitor: I thought I understood when mothers said ' by the time you have your second child, you don't change the baby every hour ' or ' you let them eat off the floor if they're quiet '... but I didn't understand the deeper implications behind these jokes- the trade offs that you make in your ability to mother in order to have a bigger family. Or I need to say: the trade offs that I make. Another person- one who . . .
it’s de-lurking time!
Today is National Delurking Day, or so I’m being told. That means it’s your day to finally leave a comment! I know . . . some of you already do. But the vast majority of you are silent readers. Maybe you are intimidated by the comment-leaving process? it’s easier than it looks, and you can log in with just your name. Just click on the “COMMENT” button below this post, and this box will appear. Ignore all the fancy log-in options. The best way to leave a comment is to manually type in your name . . .
what I want you to know: forgiving a spouse
What I Want You to Know is a series of reader submissions. It is an attempt to allow people to tell their personal stories, in the hopes of bringing greater compassion to the unique issues each of us face. If you would like to submit a story to this series, click here. This guest post is by Sue. What I want you to know is that my husband is the love of my life and we have been married for 30 years this summer. But we hit a very big bump in the road during our 8th year of marriage. That . . .
haitian orphans: two years later, still UNICEF’d
I spent a little time today reflecting on Haiti and watching some of the news updates about the country on the two-year mark since the earthquake. While I remain ever grateful that Kembe, Karis, and I survived the earthquake, it’s still a hard day to remember not only how personally difficult it was, but to be mindful of how far the country still has to go to rebuild. As I was watching some of the coverage, I came across this piece talking about the current situation for orphans in . . .
is it okay to skip out on sending thank-you cards on behalf of small children?
I have an etiquette question, and I want you guys to be honest. You are going to pretend you are Emily Post and tell me what to do. Only, you’re going to be slightly less snooty, because we’re all living in the real world here. The deal is . . . my kid’s birthday party was nearly four months ago and I’ve yet to send out thank-you cards. We had a pretty big party, and there are two of them, and they got a rather large bounty of gifts. I was pretty intentional about . . .
the new picture face
I’ve mentioned before that as soon as she started to walk, Karis developed a distinct “picture face”. The old picture face was kind of a manic smile. She was very consistent with it, no matter what was going on. If you tried to take her picture, SHE STOPPED AND MADE THE FACE. No matter what. That last picture was a year ago, and in that time, she’s grown and matured. She hasn’t matured enough to use that toilet for more than staged photo ops, mind . . .
that’s what SHE said: on chronos vs. kairos time, body image and fitspiration, adoptees as political pawns, black people in the hunger games, and the problem with tolerance
click on the title to read the whole post You Never Marry the Right Person | RELEVANT Magazine In generations past, there was far less talk about “compatibility” and finding the ideal soul-mate. Today we are looking for someone who accepts us as we are and fulfills our desires, and this creates an unrealistic set of expectations that frustrates both the searchers and the searched for. In John Tierney’s classic humor article “Picky, Picky, Picky” he tries nobly to get us to laugh at the . . .
what I want you to know: being an adopted child
What I Want You to Know is a series of reader submissions. It is an attempt to allow people to tell their personal stories, in the hopes of bringing greater compassion to the unique issues each of us face. If you would like to submit a story to this series, click here. This guest post is by Val. I was adopted right after I was born. My birth mother was young and decided she could not care for me, so I was brought to my family that I know now. I had a wonderful childhood, great parents, and . . .
what I want you to know: recovering after an abortion
What I Want You to Know is a series of reader submissions. It is an attempt to allow people to tell their personal stories, in the hopes of bringing greater compassion to the unique issues each of us face. If you would like to submit a story to this series, click here. This guest post is by an anonymous reader. Though I believe that I have been forgiven for my past sins, one still haunts me almost daily. His name is Elijah Christian. He is my baby who never got to see my face or be . . .
discussing civil rights and slavery with children – how soon is too soon?
We've been having some hard discussion at our house over some things Jafta has been learning at school. On Monday, he came home and told us about a book they read at school about the underground railroad. I was a little caught off-guard. Jafta also talked about slaves and masters, and recounted that slaves were whipped if they didn’t obey. I don’t know if he gleaned this from the teacher or from another student, but he was very troubled by the idea, and it led to some . . .
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