Apparently several people think I need saving. The Jehovah Witnesses have laid off for the moment, but today there was a knock on the door from the neighbor across the street.
She came bearing gifts: some outfits for the kids, some Michealangelo inspired bath soaps, a gawdy bedazzled jewelry box, chocolates, and a brand-spankin’ new Qu’ran and some educational literature on the Muslim faith. Once again, I was struck with an overwhelming need to let my neighbor know that her religious beliefs were quite alright with me. I even read through all the pamphlets, just so we could talk about them later. (In all honesty I find the whole thing kind of fascinating and it makes me feel very sophisticated to have a moderate, modern Muslim friend. For the same reason I like listening to world music and reading Amy Tan novels. So I can pretend to be very cultured and well-travelled in my suburban SAHM existence).
Mom, do not worry. I am not becoming a Muslim.
But this gift thing came out of left field. I have talked to this woman maybe 10 times in the last five years. It was so sweet . . . but so random. In case you cannot see clearly, the outfit for India is a shocking pink Dora dress that has DORA written in sequins, and an embroidered Dora cartoon on the attached jean skirt. This is the very kind of outfit I try to avoid my children ever laying their eyes on, because of incidences like this. I. Hate. Character. Clothes. India took one look at this at was naked in about two seconds flat, begging me to put the Dora dress on. I have never seen a one-year-old undress so fast.
Now, as my neighbor leaves – I am not joking, as she walked across the street – India ran to the door and yelled, “I love you! I love you! I love you” at the top of her lungs. Over and over again. She has never said this to anyone but me without prompting. I about peed myself from laughter. But judging by the way India reacted to her Dora dress and the chocolate I let her try, I think she is a convert. If she were pressed right now, I think she’d proclaim her devotion to Allah. Sweets and cartoon branding made a Muslim out of my daughter.
laughing. my. butt. off.
selling one’s soul for a little dora sounds like a modern day version of jacob and esau (sp?). thanks, pastor kirsten.
This is so funny!
I’m mostly just impressed that India can undress herself at age one. Miles is three and still says “I can’t do it!!!” 🙂
Gotta go, International Justice Mission on Dateline.
By the way, thank you for your comment about the catscan thing, I really do appreciate everyone’s thoughts. The 99th percentile only means true genius, I’m convinced…
Kristen,
This is awkward……um, especially since we’ve already debriefed this whole thing. I’m going to try and support you on here and write something because you guilted me. Here goes…if you really were trying to embrace her culture you would be trying to use obvious phrases from the materials in your next conversations with her. I also think it would be totally appropriate for you to teach these phrases to your kids and use them frequently to impress others with your diversity and openness. Don’t even think you are going to “out culture” me just because you’ve got the black kid and the muslim neighbor. As you know, I live in a much more diverse area and I am digging deep to into my Hebrew roots. I will be attending bar and bat mitzvahs in no time and you will be so jealous. I also have read more Amy Tan, Julia Alvarez, Lisa See, Anita Diamant (the list just goes on because I seek it out). You are making progress though.
what is up with having to get blog owner approval now? Are you seriously that scared of the stalkers? Do you have to moniter the comments now? I think you need to get over yourself.
🙂
Wow, that is either one of the nicest things I’ve seen a neighbor do for another neighbor in a long time, or the most over-the-top recruiting/educating/whatever-want-to-call-it tactic I have ever seen.
I also have a strong distaste for character clothing. Unfortunately, a few Batman and Spongebob shirts have crept their way into my boys’ wardrobes. When they were a bit younger my strategy/compromise/cave-in was to allow them whatever pajamas they wanted. I didn’t care if they were Superman, Spiderman, or the Jolly Green Giant, but when it came to clothes for going out, I put my foot down. I always admire the mommies who let their kids wear whatever they want(i.e. rubber rain boots and swimming trunks to church, Jack Sparrow costumes to the grocery store,etc.). I just could never bring myself to let mine do it. I guess that makes me a mean mom too. 🙂
You should teach India to say “Inshallah”… that would shock the heck out of the neighbor lady.
I’m totally anti-character clothing as well. Unfortunately, I think I’ve made my boys gravitate to them more. Caleb received a Power Rangers hand me down that’s way to small but when he finds it he refuses to take off.
I live in an area that has the highest percentage of muslims outside of the Middle East. We specifically choose our area to live in so we could reach out to that culture. Our neighbors are so ridiculously generous. We get our lawn mowed often, yummy treats, they buy my kids icecream from the icecream truck… It’s a cultural thing. We often give them brownies or little gifts in return. It’d say if a religion could have a love language, muslims would be gifts.
Sorry, I’ve never left such a long comment before:)
Heather – I know! My son can barely undress himself. Unless there is a Spiderman shirt involved, and then he is miraculously speedy. I think it is a girl thing.
Sara – I actually pretend that ANY character shirt is pajamas. Just recently Jafta was given a bag of hand-me-downs and when he pulled out a cars polo shirt, I was yelling “those are pj’s, those are pj’s! ” as fast as I could.
Jenn,
Okay, first of all, I am humbled that as one of my best friends in the entire world, you finally decided to grace my blog with a comment.
However.
Don’t even pretend that you are more cultured than me. I was learning to salsa dance in Florida with my Puerto Rican friends while you were earning your “street cred” in Mission Viejo with . . . oh wait, how many black people did you go to high school with?
And let’s not forget that I am the one who introduced you to Julia Alvarez. Period dramas about rich white Englsih people do not count as muticultural literature.
Why are you bringing so much tension to my blog??? Don’t make me pull rank with my blog moderation abilities. And don’t shame me for wanting a little editorial control. Oh, that’s right. You don’t have ANY control issues. 🙂
All I have to say in response to this is “Assalam Alaykum”