Karis came to me with an idea for her birthday cake. “Do you have a photo of what you want to do?” I asked. “No. It’s all in my head,” she said. Love her creativity! She totally pulled it off. And yes, matching her dress to the cake was 💯 intentional.
I am gutted by the loss of my friend Rachel today.
Rachel Held Evans is the smartest person I’ve ever met. I don’t say that with an ounce of hyperbole or exaggeration. She was absolutely the most brilliant thinker I had the pleasure of knowing. She was thoughtful, in every definition of that word. She was a deep thinker, capable of looking at things from all sides. But she was also thoughtful of everyone around her. She was an incredibly generous friend. She was warm and engaging, full of wit and spunk but also full of empathy and compassion.
Rachel and I spent the better part of the last decade in a friend group of post-evangelical misfits. It was a community of people who had grown up in a faith they had then deconstructed and put back together. We were sometimes cynical and irreverent and oftentimes silly. We updated each other on our kids, our faith crises, our personal and public failures. But most of all, we were ardent supporters of one another. We were always available to “light up a unicorn” for each other, which was our way of holding each other in prayer.
Rachel has offered me private support in some of my most painful moments of the past few years. She was a true and loyal friend. She was a constant cheerleader. This time last year, Rachel and I both had book proposals in the hands of editors (in a few cases, some of the exact same editors) and our books were being bid on in the same week. In a situation were others might have seen this as an awkward competition, Rachel was in my ear the whole way, sending texts with advice and encouragement, sharing her experience and rooting me on.
If you aren’t familiar with her, she was a prolific writer on faith and social justice issues. Her books probably shaped my faith more than any other. Rachel taught me a new reverence for a book that had been so distorted in my upbringing.
Another friend was flying out to see Rachel in her last moments and whisper messages of love in her ear. This was what I wanted to say to my friend … (cont)
I asked Sarah to tell her thank you for being such a loyal friend and cheerleader to me. Tell her how much I admired her, and how much she shaped my thinking. Thank her for showing me that both my feminine strength and intellect could be integral parts of my faith, not liabilities. Thank her for showing me how to be brave. Thank her for pointing me back to God, over and over, for the past ten years.
Goodbye, Rachel. I’m lighting all the unicorns for you and your family today.
On Saturday I went to a gala straight from the airport. Tonight I grabbed a dress from my unpacked suitcase, worn last week to the Iris Awards and not yet washed, and threw it on for another gala. It’s just non-stop glamour over here. Is this what Dave Ramsey meant about doing rich people things? (Would ask but he blocked me on Twitter.) #thatgalalifestyle@royalfamilykids
When you’re in a fancy dress ready to go to a gala but accidentally paint your nails before you put on deodorant and your friend loves you enough to apply it for you. #truefriendship #sacrificiallove@cleezy
Behold what a sporty family we are! Look at the amazing sports-appropriate outfits we were able to assemble for the first day of soccer practice for the school’s intermural soccer. 😂😂 Whatevs. This yearly event is the only time I can convince either of them to play a sport. I will accept whatever they wanna wear. #goteam#theaterkids