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that’s what she said (adoption edition)

April 17, 2010

The news media has been buzzing this week with the story about the adoptive mother who sent her seven-year-old newly adopted son back to Russia.  I’ve been wanting to sit and write out my thoughts about this story, but haven’t had the time.  I can say, in a nutshell, two things:

1) I think what she did was every kind of awful.
2) I think that the impact of institutionalization on the psyche of children is something that we all need to take more seriously.

More on that later.  For now, some links that got me thinking this week:

I did not love my adopted child  – this article from Slate in which an adoptive mom talks about her ambivalence towards her own child in the first few months of adoption, and the hardships of parenting hurting children, was an interesting read.  I also appreciated the reaction to this articule from a adult adoptee (Harlow’s Monkey: I’m tired of adoptive parent confessionals).

This post from Christine made me bawl.  A lot.

Courtney’s article called Choosing Love was the most impactful thing I’ve read in a very long time.   It was a very relevant reminder for me this week.

My Friend-I’ve-Never-Met, Debra, writes a touching letter to her son, Dear Ronel.

And, and honorary “that’s what he said” gos to Nate’s Pop, who writes a Dinner Invitation to Mike Huckabee after Huckabee compared children being adopted by gay parents to incest.  (A random note, most media references to this story use the phrase “gay adoption” – and while I see how this is an easy descriptor, it makes me cringe.  Parents can be gay, but adopted children are just adopted – not gay adopted).

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Hi, I’m Kristen. I’m a mom of four kids via birth and adoption and a writer living in Southern California. Read More.

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