Let’s start here with what nobody looks like: nobody looks like the people in magazines or movies. Not even models. Nobody. Lean people have a kind of rawboned, unfinished look about them that is very appealing. But they don’t have plump round breasts and plump round asses. You have plump round breasts and a plump round ass, you have a plump round belly and plump round thighs as well. That’s how it works. (And that’s very appealing too.) Woman have cellulite. All of them. It’s dimply and cute. It’s not a defect. It’s not a health problem. It’s the natural consequence of not consisting of photoshopped pixels, and not having emerged from an airbrush.
Okay, you’re asking here about the Obama administration’s not-so-subtle signals that it wants to launch some cruise missiles at Syria, which would be punishment for what it says is Assad’s use of chemical weapons against civilians. It’s true that basically no one believes that this will turn the tide of the Syrian war. But this is important: it’s not supposed to. The strikes wouldn’t be meant to shape the course of the war or to topple Assad, which Obama thinks would just make things worse anyway. They would be meant to punish Assad for (allegedly) using chemical weapons and to deter him, or any future military leader in any future war, from using them again.
This NYMag article states parents are the happiest when their kids are between the ages of 6 and 12. I remember reading it 3 years ago and pining for the day my kids fell into that category. While my boys don’t actually turn 6 for a few weeks, I can already see the light. No longer do we worry about them around the pool. They swim. No longer do we worry about them being monsters on an airplane. They sleep or watch shows the whole time. No longer do we worry if we want to take an afternoon nap. They’ll leave us alone. They still have tantrums when things don’t go their way, but who doesn’t? I had one yesterday. They fight like all siblings do and it drives us bonkers. They’re too loud in the morning. But the major things? Like going to bed a 8pm, being excited to be with us, and turning on Netflix by themselves in the morning? All that adds up after a while.
My pride that Hailey is the best speller in her class is overshadowed by the embarrassment that I don’t have the energy to be a PTA mom. I’m happy my first book was so successful, but I suffer with writer’s block so much that I’m always sure I’ll never write again and that I’ll never finish my second book. I feel like from the outside looking in I seem successful and happy, but I can’t help but think that if people looked closer they’d see the cracks and the dirt and shame of a million projects that never get done.
Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherf—king ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layers lengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A F—KING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.
My next favorite thing is My Today Show Caption. Please read it. “Aware that time goes by fast- and okay with it.” That’s my claim to fame. That’s it you guys. I am the woman who is aware that time goes by fast. Not only am I AWARE of this, but I’m OKAY with it. I mean, does it get more revolutioary and/or heroic than that? It’s like- the only way my 15 minutes of fame could have been more impressive would have been I were “The Woman Who is Aware That Rain Is Wet. And Thinks That’s Fine.”
I would love to tell you this has never happened to me… and yet, beyond my efforts to keep all my friendships healthy and whole, I’m sorry to say, it has happened. It has been some of my life’s deepest sorrows to lose a good friend, for reasons that in some instances that have been beyond my control, or whose fate led to lives leading in different directions, and though it’s hard to own, have been part of my own doing a particular time or two.
Participants’ negative mood heightened as the ratio of people from different ethnic backgrounds aboard the train increased, regardless of their own race and after controlling for various factors, such as an individual’s personality, familiarity with metro trains and perceived safety of the surrounding neighborhoods. In both studies, however, those who had a sense of purpose or had written about their life aims did not experience the worsened mood associated with riding among a diverse crowd.
Oh nothing. Just having church, singing old-school hymns in a bar. (via Catherine O’Neill Thorn HT Matthew Paul Turner)