We actually got called with a potential placement last week for two boys – a newborn and a two year old. We met with the boys the next day, and got a clearer picture of the situation with the birth family. Ultimately, we both left feeling like it was not a situation we should move forward with. It was disappointing, but at the same time we both feel a greater peace for knowing for sure that the stress and anxiety we were feeling beforehand was probably because it was not the right situation. There were some other things that just didn’t sit well with us. The birth father, despite a criminal record, has only been ordered one parenting class to reclaim custody. So at any time, he could attend that and the kids could return. In addition, both he and the birthmom has been threatening to the social worker, and even went hiding with the kids before they were taken into custody. While I realize that every fost-adopt situation will involve birth family drama, we felt like this was more than we could handle right now.
We also had an interesting realization on the way up, as our social worker was telling us how we had beat out several other families who had been waiting less time for a placement, and how lucky we were because these kids were so “highly desirable” due to their age and light complexion. As we met with these kids, I just really got the convection that these were not our kids – because we feel called to take the children that we not as easy to place. So we declined going forward – which was a brutal decision after meeting these adorable kids. So, we are back to the wait, which is hard after having some serious hope that the wait was finally over, you know?
Man, I hate waiting!!